What to feel?

Today is my EDD from the December pregnancy. August 29, 2013. I don't even know what to feel today. This journey has been so long, so hard. Pokes, prodes, waiting, disappointment, loss. I could have a baby in my arms today. Tears.

 
But today there is also hope, because I am still pregnant. And the lines are still getting darker. My first beta is tomorrow but boooo hiissssss their policy is not to call until after the second, which is Tuesday.  I'll be begging tomorrow, but I doubt that will change anything.







In other news, I tried a Pinterest project last night and it turned out GREAT!  This is my new cover for my iPhone:

MOAR PEE STICKS

The only logical way to get through this week until my beta tests is peeing on sticks, right? Right.

Wow. They are still positive. The digi was negative yesterday and positive today. Seems like that is a step in the right direction that HCG is still increasing! Maybe this is real life?

Tomorrow is my EDD from our December IVF pregnancy. I don't even really know how I feel about that. I'm so excited to be pregnant again, but obviously it is still really early and anything can happen. I think I'm going to the bathroom 800 times a day to check things out. No bleeding, but that doesn't stop me from excessively checking. I wonder if I ever will stop checking?I had some more cramping last night, which of course I catastrophized. My brain knows that it's normal. Now if only my heart would believe it!